Pardon?

There's too much sadness and grief inside of me that I cannot grasp what I am made of. Am I made of broken glass? Maybe that's why I have a fragile heart and that every word hurts my naked soul and I bleed in hidden tears. Am I made of chaos? That would explain why my mind is always running in circles. Am I made of mistakes and unspoken truth? That would be the reason why I hurt myself just to protect her from falling and drowning all over again. Am I made of the ashes of burnt love? Because I love fighting for everyone but I go into battles with my own thoughts every single night. I guess i am made of several wounds and scars that I hide everyday, because of how much I hate the looks of empathy and vulnerability. I detest what I'm made of because I carry myself heavily..
Darling, I wait every night, I tell myself to search for nothing yet for a healing..
They say time heals but it hurts and burns my wounds.
In no control of my own.. I belong to nobody and nothing
Forget my name
I will be free .. I'm in need of help and shelter
Take me to a mountain today because It might save me from my mind
An ocean full of love is all you shall ever drown into when you see me
But, if only I could save you from my waves and help you to the shore of safety
I'm no stable and no longer worth it
And please, no arguments now
Wait and see, your heart will know
I'm no longer worth it
you have to search for a simple way to put yourself through that
I sent you a warning sign and,
your eyes choose not to see
Flames will have been easier for you
But my tides controlled you
Over the wall, you seek the magic of my words and rarity of my existence
But, darling, what about the silence that will deaf you from curiosity ?
You are so brave, I hope you fly and never feel my heart again
Hurt is all I shall bring you
Pardon my mistakes
I had no intention nor interest to push you off the ledge and watch your heart fall
I needed to catch you..
But it's too late now
Surrender to yourself and walk
Away from me..
Hurt is all I shall bring you.