A Hopeless Romantic

Throughout my years, I've believed, seen, felt and experienced love. Love from first sight, conversation, laughter and even dreams. Friends to lovers. Strangers to lovers. Even, haters to lovers. I think I've had it all, didn't I? Well, let leave the answer to the world.

The thing is, love is rather twisted and bizarre and confusing and drives to the highest forms of being insane. Literally. You could have the courage to throw yourself from a rooftop or in front of a car and you wouldn't give a shit about getting hurt. And I  guess that's the thing with love, it's a drug. It's stimulates your poor heart and rushes you with more adrenaline to do those stupidest craziest acts of love. Or aren't they acts of utter foolishness? I mean seriously, what the mystery between the excess courage and love? It's almost like those tales we'd read about love potions.

I don't about you, but I certainly speak for myself when I say that I'm an utter hopeless romantic. Almost a pathetic one. But I don't really mind.

My whole childhood went by reading fairy tales, listening about the heroic act of the prince charming saving his princess and the knight in shinning armor on his white horse to take his gracious lover away. And my teenage years and till now, I still sink into my bed watching rom coms, the sappy cliche ones and the fascinating heartwarming ones, and even the crappy cheesy ones. I'm a sucker for a good love story. Even my most reads, where about romance and the pain of it.

But, what blows my mind, why is love always connected with pain with me? Like how, I almost feel like if i didn't feel the pain then I'm not feeling any love. Could be my love compass have broken.

Oh, well.. our beliefs and aspects of love is wide and free and that what makes love is the most fundamental and the essence of this shitty love anyhow.

Wow, I'm writing this while downloading Sleepless in Seattle. 

But seriously, does love ever had a happy ending or it's just in the blockbuster movies? To be honest, I kinda enjoy seeing others' love stories and their happy endings rather than experience one myself.

This is me, apologizing for my heart which I had broken too many times that I dont even think it still works. I'm sorry for you, but I hope you just start bumping blood nothing more and stop it with those silly dreamy feelings. I've had enough of feeling, I'll just stick to my novels and movies..

Oh, Sleepless in Seattle has downloaded. Now, excuse me I've some tears to cry out.